It is OK to give yourself grace.
Raising children in general is not easy. Raising children with developmental disabilities such as autism adds another level of challenge that many people on the outside simply cannot imagine.
It’s not like a spring day full of sunshine, birds chirping, and butterflies flying. It’s not like a pleasant walk in the park. Some days, it feels more like climbing a dreadful mountain, with obstacles flying at you from every angle.
Parents raising children on the spectrum know how overwhelming the day-to-day can feel. It might be constant spills, endless messes, or behaviors that undo your hard work in seconds. You clean, you organize, you try to set order—and within moments, it looks as if you never touched it. Those small, repetitive challenges can build up and drive you absolutely crazy, leaving you drained before the day is even halfway through.
There are days when you feel like screaming into a pillow, when tears come before you even finish cleaning up the last mess. You love your child more than anything, but the weight feels unbearable. If you’ve ever felt that, you’re not weak—you’re human.
And in those moments, you have to remind yourself: give yourself grace.
As parents and caregivers, we often feel guilty for needing a break. Guilty for saying, “I need a woosah moment.” Guilty for planning a weekend away. Guilty for reaching out to our circle and asking for a “tap out.”
But why?
Why do we feel guilty saying:
We have to remember that needing a reset doesn’t make us less loving or less committed. It makes us human.
I call it the tap-out movement. It’s not about giving up. It’s about recharging so we can keep going.
Go sit on the beach and let the sun beat on you.
Go for a walk in the park where you don’t have to run after kids.
Go get your nails or your feet done.
Go do something just for you.
Because you matter. And if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be healthy or strong enough to care for your child who needs you more than anything else.
So here it is, loud and clear: I am giving you permission.
Permission to take care of yourself.
Permission to reset.
Permission to say, “I need a moment.”
No more chores. No more guilt. No more apologizing for being human. It’s your time. It’s reset time. And you, my friend, deserve it.
If you find yourself struggling, feeling overwhelmed, or frustrated, please—don’t take it out on your child. Instead, try to follow these simple steps for your own reset:
Take a breath before reacting.
If your child is safe, step into another room for a moment.
Call a friend, sibling, or parent who can give you a short tap-out break.
Do one small thing for yourself, even if it’s just sipping tea in silence.
Come back knowing you’ve reset, and you’re ready again.
So if today feels like too much, breathe. Step back. Remember that thousands of us are climbing this same mountain. You are not failing. You are not alone. And you will get through this.
💙 To every parent and caregiver reading this: You are doing more than enough. And you deserve grace, rest, and joy too.
My name is Charlene Pinnock**, and I’m the founder of *WeAre Autism*—a platform I created out of love for my son Marcus, who is on the autism spectrum. As a mother, advocate, and writer, I share educational articles based on my lived experiences, cultural background, and the everyday lessons I learn while raising a neurodivergent child. My goal is to support and empower other parents and caregivers, especially within the Jamaican community, by offering real stories, practical tips, and encouragement. You're not alone on this journey—and if no one else says it, I will: you're doing an amazing job.
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